Heyward Bruce Ewart III – “A Man’s Account: Growing up with Abuse”

Authors Airwaves is pleased to present Heyward Bruce Ewart, III, PhD reading “A Man’s Account” from his new book AM I BAD? Recovering From Abuse. Compared to domestic violence against women, the of-fense applied to men is rare but yet not absent. Male victims of domestic abuse are rarely attacked physically; instead, they are assaulted verbally and mentally in the partnership. In my practice I have treated both men and women, although in separate groups. Because the same dynamics apply for men; that is, child abuse leading to later abuse, it is worth devoting this account of one single case, because it is indeed an excellent example of the principles so far discussed.David, now in his 60s, still has monthly or more frequent dreams of conquering his father, who has been deceased for nearly 30 years. He remembers as a boy watching his father proudly weave two leather dog leashes together for training the family pet, a pedigree Boxer. At the end of the two woven leashes, he attached a hard, wrapped ball, somewhat larger than a golf ball, which he formed by tightly winding a long, leather thong. He left some remaining strips dangling loose off the end of the ball to resemble a cat-of-nine-tails. Even at his young age, the boy wondered why such a device would be needed to train a dog.Not long after the project was complete, David learned that the weapon was for him. He had been accused, at age 7, of talking back to a teacher, something he had not done, as he tried repeatedly to explain to his parents. But his father took out that odd weapon. The man remembers the horror of not being able to get away, incapable of standing, trying to scurry under the kitchen sink, only to be yanked straight in the air by one arm so the father could get another series of blows in. On and on it went, until the boy believed it would continue until he was dead.
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If you were abused or neglected as a child, chances are that you have been your whole life, whether you are a man, a woman, or a teen. Child abuse so mangles the personality that the victim unconsciously attracts abusers throughout the life cycle. Lies about yourself were planted deep in your mind by the abuse, and you still believe them. They are crippling your life! Do you have any of these signs?

  • You have symptoms of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).
  • You feel like a second-class citizen.
  • Nobody understands: they ask, “Why can’t you get over it?”
  • You have escaped one abuser only to end up with another.

Until you understand exactly what the abuse did to you, you cannot get free. You can stay in therapy your whole life and never get a clue. OR you can unravel the mysteries once and for all and bring everything to light by reading AM I BAD? Recovering from Abuse. A great resource for victims, therapists, and group work.

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